"Real" Marriage

I would like to say something about the realistic side of marriage that some people push under the rug. It might be TMI but I really feel like saying something. 

Every day will not be gumdrops and daisies. There will be times within a day where you fight, disagree, have different views and expectations, and you might not want to be around each other. However, marriage offers the sweetest moments of little things that come together to make your love grow for one another. These moments may be small and insignificant but they always mean something to the two people in a marriage. You shouldn't always expect to feel "in love" but you should always recognize the deep, satisfying love that comes from knowing the person you're with won't leave and won't give up. Gumdrops and daisies are nice but, at the end of the day, being with someone you know you can trust will mean more than all the romantic gestures you can get from anywhere else.

Don't be too idealistic about your expectations for a marriage. Take it at face value and see the good and bad that can happen and say, "I'll love it anyway".

Thoughts on Children

I saw a list in August on Pinterest about some number of things to do before you have a baby. After reading the list, I was a little saddened because many of the things that you HAVE to do before you have a baby are things that would be EVEN MORE FUN with a baby(or three). Making memories with a family is more fun than making memories with friends. Years from now, when you sit with your family, it will mean more to reminisce about FAMILY trips and vacations and memories than it will be to talk about trips with friends. Don't hold back from experiencing life in its RICHEST forms.

I was in a parenting class for my major last semester and this is from one of the readings: 

Those who devote themselves to having children and doing all they can to raise them

righteously will be crowned with the greatest blessings God can give to His offspring: full equality with Him. They will be granted the full extent of His creative power. Therefore,President Harold B. Lee warned: “Those who refuse as husbands and wives to have children are proving themselves already too small for the infinitude of God’s creative powers.”

Women Request Tickets to Priesthood Session of LDS General Conference

I wanted to share this article in Deseret News about women seeking the priesthood in the LDS (Mormon) church.

http://www.deseretnews.com/article/865586996/LDS-Church-responds-to-priesthood-meeting-request-by-activists.html?pg=all

I found this an interesting piece because it shows how these women feel in a very respectful way.  As a member of the Church, and a woman, I disagree with what Kelly has said about women deserving to be on "equal" spiritual footing.  Something that I took an interest into when I was younger was the priesthood and how it is used.  Men in the Church are ordained with sacred priesthood and power that they are to use to help and serve.  Women have immediate access to this power just by knowing a worthy priesthood holder.  We can ask for Heavenly Father's help through that priesthood at any time.  We work side by side with priesthood holders who serve as leaders in the Church.  Because we have all these opportunities to work with and receive help from the priesthood, there really is no immediate need for women to be ordained.

Personally, I feel that my understanding of how the priesthood affects my life has helped me to feel just as righteous and spiritually powerful as the men around me.  I allow them to serve me as they offer priesthood blessings or pass sacrament(very similar to Catholic Eucharist) during church.  I let them help me as we team together to plan ward(congregation) activities and make better changes in the Church.  They do what God has asked them to do by using their priesthood to lift those around them.  I do what God has asked me to do by allowing them to exercise this power in ways that help me.

I don't want the priesthood and I never will.  I am overjoyed that my husband, father, brothers, uncles, and grandfathers all have this sacred power that is used to empower all those around them.  I am pleased with my role as supporter more than I think I would be if I were the "user".  I am content to fill my spiritual bucket and watch them fill theirs in the ways we've been given.

What I've learned.

This list is from a while back but the lessons I learned still apply.  I hope this helps someone…yup.

 1.  All things will end up fixed whether it’s the way you want it or not.

 2.  Crying makes you feel better…so let yourself cry.

 3.  Pray!  Always pray.

 4.  Keep going to church NO MATTER WHAT!!

 5.  Holding on to the anger and hurt only makes the wound deeper.

 6.  Let go and forgive.  Allow yourself to move on.

 7.  Go to the temple or think of the temple as often as you can.  Great strength is given by your righteous desires.

 8.  Read your scriptures.  Read anything from them that is worth reading.

 9.  Talk about what you are feeling, even if it’s out loud to yourself.

10.  Recognize your part in your life and do all you can to fix whatever is wrong with you.

11.  Don’t pity yourself.  Go to work.

12.  Most importantly:  Have a positive attitude, have faith, and hold tightly to the Lord.

Climbing

Have you ever had an experience where you felt like you were climbing and climbing and there would never be an end to the climbing?  I know I have.  I was thinking about that today and a few things came to mind.  First, is the mountain you are climbing really big enough to keep going?  I mean, there are some problems that really are as big as they feel but, there are others that are tiny molehills.  The first step to figuring out how to handle the problem is to find out how big it is(that way you don't waste more energy than is necessary figuring it out).

The second thing I thought about was whether or not you actually need to keep climbing.  There are times when mountain climbers have to stop and rest for a while.  Sometimes they stop because they are tired.  Other times they stop because the weather is too bad or they need to be acclimated.  If you are tired from climbing, take a break.  Maybe you need to adjust to what is going on in the moment before moving on to the next incline.  Perhaps if you keep going things will only get messier and more complicated and problematic.  Make sure you really need to be climbing before you waste time doing so.

The third thing is that you always need to remember that there is an end to the mountain.  Sooner or later, you will reach the top.  You will stand on the peak and look out at all the beauty in front of you and behind you.  You will see how far you've come and how many obstacles you overcame.  There will be a feeling of accomplishment and great thanksgiving when you finally see all that you have done.

God says to us in Alma 26 that "when our hearts [are] depressed....behold, the Lord [comforts] us, and [says]:  Go...and bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success."

Go and have patience.  Look at the mountain you are climbing and make sure you are doing what is needful.

Call Me

I don't know if anyone else feels this way but, I love loving people.  I love helping others.  It makes me so happy.  I love listening to what others have to say about their lives.  Actually, I find lives incredibly intriguing.  We are so dimensional and multifaceted.  We have our own situations and even the similar ones are different.  Learning how others view their lives and what they want to do with them or where they want them to go is fascinating.
I also believe that talking everything out makes the weight leave you.  So, I work to make myself available at any time so that others can have a listening ear and a loving heart to talk to.  I have spent years learning how to love and accept anyone for who they are, no matter what.  I want to be someone that people can come to and know that what they say to me will never make my opinion of them change.  I want to be the person they can call for any reason and I will help as much as I can.  I want others to feel that I love them.  I want them to feel comfortable.
Plus, loving people helps you forget yourself.  It helps you really tune in on the other person which, in turn, makes you forget all of your problems.  Focusing on others helps me relate to them better; I have more empathy and sympathy.  I am a better tool in the Lord's hand.  I can touch people that need to be touched.  I can do great things with love.
LOVE.  It's the best thing you can do.  :)

Where's your focus?

You know how you always feel like your problem is the biggest one?  You focus on what's wrong with you and become consumed in your own problems.  Well, I've learned that my problems are not as big as others'.  Today, I spoke with my friend who is going through a tough trial.  She lost her father to cancer a while ago and, now, her mother is slowly dying from cancer in her back.  My friend is not even thirty but her parents will both be gone.  She exhibits so much strength and faith every day.  She lives with her mom, or relatively close, and watches her as each day she gets a little more unhealthy.  But, my friend loses no hope.  She has faith in the plan of happiness, where families can be together forever.  She has faith that God knows us all and watches us and helps us.  She has faith that Jesus Christ suffered for us and that he is the greatest comforter we can ask for.  She is such a brave young lady and her mom is such brave example to all of us of happiness and faith.

Our problems are big to us but, if we can look around us, we can find others who struggle too.  We can find people who need love and support even when they don't know it.  We can strengthen ourselves by strengthening others.  We can spread love and healing and peace.  We can show our faith by looking past ourselves and focusing on others.